Wanted (2008)

From Netflix: "Wesley Gibbon (James McAvoy) is just an ordinary guy, unaware that his long-lost father is one of the world's most notorious assassins. But when his father is killed, a mysterious associate named Sloan (Morgan Freeman) arrives, offering Wesley the chance to fill dad's shoes. Mentored by Sloan's deputy, Fox (Angelina Jolie), Wesley carries out the will of the mythological Fates, who see Wesley's targets in a magical loom."

James McAvoy and Angelina Jolie

Yup, they pick who to kill from a 'magical loom'. No joke. Maybe I am getting too old to really enjoy these kinds of nonsensical action movies. Don't get me wrong, I like action movies. I enjoy the "turn off brain, watch the chaos - isn't this fun?" part of it. However, a lot of the recent action movies are not enjoyable to me. Why? Well, they have turned into silly cartoon versions of movies where the laws of any science are completely tossed out the window and reality is a joke.

Let's take this movie as an example. Yes, James McAvoy is the son of an assassin who is then trained to be an assassin. I don't care HOW much training you get for your entire life - you can't be trained to override the laws of physics. They are LAWS. So, you can't shoot a bullet in a circle and have it enter 6 different peoples heads, around that circle - and keep going - to kill every single one of them. First of all, hello, the bullet is traveling in a circle. Second of all, velocity and momentum changes as an object hits other objects - in many situations, trajectory will change too. None of this applies in this, supposedly normal, but yet superhuman assassin training camp.

I just can't get into that. Is it that I am getting too old? Maybe.

It reminded me of the movie "Crank" that I saw recently. They similarly did crazy stuff that couldn't have been possible, but they did it with a wink and a nod, making fun of themselves knowing they were defying all logic and all laws. It wasn't serious and wasn't meant to be. That was OK with me. However, this was supposed to be an in-your-face, cool action thriller. You know, with a group of assassins that get their assignment from ... a loom. Uh huh.

Unless you have a huge crush on Angelina Jolie or just a die-hard comic book, action film fan - totally skip this. The few fun parts (mainly where MacAvoy tells off his horrible boss) are not worth all the frustration you feel when watching the totally implausible rest of the movie.

Grab Bag O' Movies

I have watched several movies lately that I either couldn't think of a good way to write a movie review for them or I just didn't want to write about it. So, instead, I thought I would do a quick drive-by type movie synopsis/review of these movies.

The Bank Job (2008):
From Netflix: "Based on a true 1971 event, this thriller tells the story of Terry (Jason Statham), a car dealer who becomes involved in a London bank heist only to find that the contents of the bank vault will draw him deeply and irrevocably into the city's criminal underbelly. Murder and scandal abound in this tale of corruption populated with a surprising mix of offenders, from low-level thugs to government officials and all the way up to the royal family."

This one was my favorite of the bunch. However, this had so many twists and turns that it would have been hard to do any kind of a review without really giving the movie away. I thought this would be a typical Jason Statham action movie with constant action, but it wasn't. It was much more than that and I definitely recommend this one.

Premonition (2007):
From Netflix: "A housewife (Sandra Bullock) is devastated when her husband (Julian McMahon) dies suddenly in a car crash. But when he reappears the next day as if nothing had ever happened, she realizes it may have just been a premonition. Can she prevent the horrible tragedy from happening all over again, or is she powerless to redirect fate? Amber Valletta and Nia Long also star."

I didn't really like this one. Again, I would have had to lay out the entire movie to review this one just to tell you why I didn't like it. I thought they were going a clever way with the idea of "if you knew someone had betrayed you and you had the opportunity to save them, would you still?" That was intriguing to me. However, they hinted at that theme and then twisted it again and went a different way. Bullock's performance was great - it was good to see her do something more meaty than romantic comedy. However, it was just not very satisfying with the mixed themes and confusing plot and, well ... it was just a mess.

My Best Friend's Girl (2008):
From Netflix: "When Dustin's (Jason Biggs) girlfriend, Alexis (Kate Hudson), breaks up with him, he employs his best buddy, Tank (Dane Cook), to take her out on the worst rebound date imaginable in the hopes that it will send her running back into his arms. But when he begins to really fall for Alexis, Tank finds himself in an impossible position. Alex Baldwin and Lizzy Caplan star in this romantic comedy from director Howard Deutch (The Whole Ten Yards). "

This was another one of those guy oriented romantic comedies. I really hate this trend in movies. However, this was better than "Forgetting Sarah Marshall". I had problems with "My Best Friend's Girl" because I kept finding Dane Cook charming one minute and completely irritating the next. Plus, I didn't really buy Kate Hudson's character or Jason Biggs character. Given that, they still had some funny scenes and I loved the location shoot of this in Boston. They made Boston look amazing and since I love Boston, I loved seeing a love story to the great city in this film.

Crank (2006):
From Netflix: "Hit man Chev Chelios (Jason Statham) tears through the streets of Los Angeles in a race to save his own life and his girlfriend Eve (Amy Smart) in this ticking time bomb of a thriller. The freelance killer is poisoned when a mob job goes wrong, and the clock starts ticking when Chelios learns he can elude death if he keeps his adrenaline pumping. With no time to waste, Chelios rampages through the city hoping to save Eve and find an antidote."

This one was such an odd one. It was much more of the typical Jason Statham movie that is action, on time and all the time. It was odd though because the premise and the situations are so ludicrously implausible that it was more like a Wyle Coyote cartoon where Wyle falls off the cliff, but is chasing the road runner 5 seconds later. So if you can implement a high suspension of disbelief for this, it is fun at times and seriously action-packed. If you can't, you will just keep repeating "Come ON - No WAY that is possible!" the entire movie.

I admit, this is the laziest blog I may have ever done, but there you go. Enjoy the fruits of my laziness. I would rate these movies from best to worst as (best) "The Bank Job", "My Best Friend's Girl", "Crank" and then "Premonition" (worst). Anyone seen any of these and have an opinion to share?